That
magic in film, exposure to light and then a chemical reaction to produce a
latent image: something that I am trying to do, by capturing a thought, some
idea of a latent memory, how can I ever record a memory? It can only be a suggestion
of.
And as I do explore those memories that haunt
my head from time to time - DELUSION, INTRUSION AND CONFUSION come to mind.
If there is something that appears to lie beyond
the natural world, as it is now imperfectly understood, we hope eventually
to understand it and embrace it within the natural. As ever when we unweave
a rainbow, it will not become less wonderful
(Dawkins, 2007 p.35)
exploring
the GOD delusion
So there it
begins, my unweaving, my suggestion of memory in my images, pinhole images
of a garden, of a space, of a illusion
For the last two years I have been photographing
the gardens of my family, or I should say the space that their gardens once
occupied when they lived in the houses and the ones I played in. These garden
spaces have some special meaning to me and a link back to my family no longer
in the physical presence, only in my memory space.
Because these spaces have
changed over the years as in physical space, the ONLY true/fALSE meaning and
any value I have left are my memories.
The first garden I went back to photograph
was my family home, my beginning from an infant to eight years old. Home my
very first home the house I grew up in, the house I was a baby in, in a pram
and a cot, London, Streatham, 34 Montrell Road. Middle floor. Hazy memories,
I can see dark colours or I always think of dark colours when I think of Montrell
Road. Deep reds and burnt oranges, browns and heavy fabrics. Dark rooms at
night. Very dark. Curtains closed. And hiding behind the wardrobe.
I go back
to the physical space of the gardens I once played in and record how it is
now and by doing so trigger latent memories and discover another part of myself
on the journey. In that respect I see myself as an observer of my personal
memories that most importantly relate to my family.
The experiences influences
and interactions in my life are part of my outer tangible world, the point
of reality and physical existence. And as an artist through the medium of photography
I create images, which are fragments of my intangible world, the memories and
thoughts. Photographs confront us with a visual image of our existence in the
world and photography, unlike any other medium, has power to record moments
in time and present to us as document/evidence to that particular moment and
yet the actual meaning is not always so tangible.